Watch, stand fast in the faith, be brave, be strong. Let all that you do be done with love. I Corinthians 16:13, 14 NKJV

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

New Year's Eve

This morning our oldest son ended up having a 102.8 temp and had to go to the Dr. He tested positive for the flu. I had went over there and picked up SweetPea - before he went to the Dr. And we have had her ever since. We are going to attempt to keep her over night. It will be the first time she has stayed over night. I think she will do good. She has done great so far. She has had he bath and is now watching a favorite show to help her calm down a bit and then it will be story time!!

The plan had been that he was going to work half a day - and then come and get SweetPea and I was going to be able to spend a couple of hours this afternoon running some much needed errands. But it is a good thing that I have learned long ago to hold my plans loosely. It turned out that my husband got off of work a couple of hours early and then we all 3 went to run errands. I just don't have all of my strength back yet. In fact, I ended up having to carry my granddaughter to my car and then to the house cause she was still in pj's this morning and I have been sore- this evening- from hysterectomy. So I will need to take it a little easier if possible. It is hard to do when you have a young child in your home.

Today I picked up the prescriptions that had been called in by the oncologist- for nausea. That was a little bit of a challenge for me. It is things like that - that make all of this real to me. There are times that life seems normal and I tend to forget what is going on and then something hits me- and there it is again. It sure does give me lots of practice of learning to trust God - when I don't understand what is going on.

This new years eve- we are doing what we do every year and that is stay home. A lot of times we get a movie or something like that - to make it special but I really don't like getting out. This New Year's Eve is a bit different since we have our granddaughter. We live just outside of a city - actually in the city limits but we have not always been in the city limits so our neighbors like to shoot off fire works. I am hoping that the fan that we run for noise will cover the sound of the fire works so we all can get some sleep tonight. It has been a long day and I am one tired girl- will probably be going to bed early. Have a wonderful New Year's Eve. :O)

The Test of Faith

Remember a while back I read through the book - "The Cross and It's Shadow"
by Stephen Haskell. It was such an excellent book that I have decided to read it again. There is so much valuable information in this book. Today I discovered something that I had not taken notice of last time I read it. And it was so cool - I wanted to share it with you all. I hope you are blessed by this as I was.

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Of all the sacrifices recorded in the book of Genesis, none comes so near the great antitypical offering as the one required of Abraham when God called him to offer his only son. The test of faith was not simply in the fact that Isaac was his only legitimate son, but Abraham understood that through Isaac's posterity the long-promised Messiah was to come; and in offering Isaac, Abraham was cutting off his only hope of salvation, as well as that of the world. But his faith wavered not. He believed that the same God who had performed a miracle in giving him a son, could bring that son from the dead to fulfil the promise that He had made. (Heb 11:17-19)

The Lord chose the exact spot for the offering of Isaac. He said to Abraham, "Get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt-offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of." (Gen. 22:2) As Abraham and Isaac went on that memorable journey, they were directed by the Lord to Mount Moriah; and when they came to the place, Abraham built an altar and bound Isaac upon it, ready to sacrifice him; but the Lord stayed his hand.  The spot where such loyalty to God was shown was ever afterward honored by the Lord. But the devil as well as the Lord watched over this place. He knew it was sacred to Jehovah, because there God had tested the faith of the man He honored by calling him. His friend. (James 2:23)  For more than four hundred years after the children of Israel entered the promised land, Satan held this place. It was a stronghold of the enemy in the midst of Israel. But it was finally captured by David, who made it the capital of his kingdom; afterward Jerusalem was called the "City of David."   The threshing-floor of Ornan the Jebusite, where the angel of the Lord appeared to David, was on this same spot. The prophet told David to erect an altar on the threshing-floor, and there David made a special consecration to the Lord. A few years later the temple, which was erected without sound of hammer, occupied this same plot of land. (2 Chor. 3:1) God had conquered, and He designed the place should ever be hallowed by His presence. But His people were unfaithful, and when the Lord of light came to His own temple, He was despised a n d crucified, and the holy city and the site of the sacred temple passed into the hands of the Gentiles.  Satan is guarding this spot vigilantly at the present time, intending never again to relinquish his hold upon it. But the time is coming when, in spite of Satan and all his host, the same Saviour who was rejected in His own temple shall place His feet upon the Mount of Olives, (Zech 14:4-11) and the Mt of Olives shall be split in two, making a very large valley and the entire site of old Jerusalem will be purified; then the New Jerusalem will come down from heaven (Rev. 21:2-3) and rest upon that spot made sacred by the consecration of God's chosen people. God's glorious heavenly temple will be upon Mount Zion [Moriah], never-more to fall into the hands of the enemy. God says, "I. . . will set My sanctuary in the midst of them for evermore."

Sunday, December 29, 2013

A little area can become bigger- if allowed

Hello- I have a few minutes and thought I would drop in and do a little up date. Last night for the first time in over a week- I was actually able to sleep a straight 6 hours without waking up because of pain! It felt so good to wake up and realize that I had slept that long. I am feeling a little more positive today.


Our Sabbath School teacher shared a little story with us that really helped me. It was just what I needed to hear.

He -let's call him Bill, was at a 12 step meeting. The man next to him- reached his arm over and began to scratch a little area on Bill's shoulder. Bill said, "Larry, what are you doing?"

Larry said, "being satan."  And he began to share how that is just how satan does us - he finds a sore spot - like a temptation, disappointment, or frustration and he begins to just scratch at it- before long the sore is bigger and bigger- if we allow him to continue to scratch at that area.

I had been being scratched at over the last couple of weeks. The list of side effects of chemo are scary. And he had been really scratching at that with me. It had me down.

When I heard this little story - it encouraged me. It helped me realize that even though these fears are scratched at - I can choose not to let it bother me. I can look to Jesus and remember that He is in control and that He will get me through what ever it is I will face over the next 6 months of my life. It is all scary - I am not going to lie. But I have hope - Hope in Jesus Christ and I am thankful that I have Him in my life.


I hope you guys are all having a great week end. My son has SweetPea this week so I will be taking care of her. I am glad that I am feeling more positive and have a bit more energy.

I'll check in again later. Take Care :O)

Friday, December 27, 2013

The Beatitudes..Sermon on the Mount...Summary So Far

"Christ knows that in many ways we struggle with the same temptations that the people were confronted with back then. His sermon on the mount is just as beautiful and powerful now as it was 2,000 years ago."—Ted N. C. Wilson, "Living With Heaven in Our Hearts," 2013 Week of Prayer readings, AR

"Jesus turns ordinary human ideas about happiness upside down. Contrary to general opinion, it is not the go-getters, the tough ones, those who bend the rules, who are the real successes. The truly happy ones are those who recognize the spiritual poverty(verse3) of self- reliance and learn to depend wholly on God."
Eerdmans' Concise Bible Handbook pg. 264

If you have missed any of the postings during this series - Here are links to each of the posts:

The Beatitudes Sermon on the Mount part 1

Blessed are the Poor in Spirit

Foundation Work

Blessed are those who Mourn

Blessed are the Meek

Blessed are those who Hunger and Thirst

Blessed are the Merciful

Blessed are the Peacemakers

Blessed are the Pure in Heart

This series was started a while back and I remembered that I had these quotes that I wanted to share with you all. So I thought I would do a post - listing a link to the different posts.

I am hoping to get back to finishing out this series but that will have to wait until God inspires me again. I don't want to just share what I think - I want to share what God inspires me to share.

I am hoping to be able to doing posts about great things I have been learning - but right now I have just not felt inspired. About 3 weeks ago - I found out that I had cancer and so much has happened over the last 3 weeks. And so much that I am going to go through over the next 6 months.

I am trying to work through the different emotions that I have been feeling. It's been hard to get a good nights sleep since the port was put in. What is sad is the week before it was put in - I was starting to be able to sleep on my stomach - my favorite way to sleep and had started sleeping better. But it will take a bit to get to that point again.

I talked to my oncologist's nurse today - and asked her if it was normal for me to be so sore- in some ways - I am in more discomfort than when I had the hysterectomy. She said it is normal - and that it would probably be sore for about 2 weeks- tomorrow will be one week since it was put in.

Anyway I just wanted to get this posted - and round out the series. I may have missed

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Not a Quiet Christmas at Home After All

Well we had an interesting Christmas. We were going to have a Family get together at my Mother's house- but she and then her husband got a rash and they have not been able to figure out what the cause is- and they did not want to expose me. And trust me - as much as I would have loved to have gotten together as a family- I do not want a itchy rash. So it was going to be a quiet day at home. We had decided to wait till Sunday to have our family get together - since our granddaughter will be with us then.

My husband has started to get sore throat and not feel good on Christmas eve- about 9-10pm. The next morning - he took his temp. and it was about 99 or so. As the day went on - the number on the thermometer went up. And when it got to 103.8 we decided it was a good idea to get him to a Dr. So with it being Christmas Day we had to go to the ER. After a couple of hours we were headed home- with prescriptions to get him some meds. It was basically the beginnings of the flu. So glad we got him seen that quick. His temps have been a steady 100-102 today. When I was picking up his prescriptions -I bought myself some CVS brand Airborne stuff - the tablets that you drop down into 4-6 ounces of water and let it set for 1 - 2 minutes and then you drink it. I took one last night and have had 2 today- I will have one a little later. It is suppose to give you nutrients to help your immune system. Anyway so I am sure hoping I do not get sick. I did get the flu shot this year in October, it seems that if I had not have had it done then - I would have had to get it after this cancer diagnosis.

I made us a pan of Chicken and Dumplings for supper. We needed something warm and soothing like that.

Anyway I hope you all had a good Christmas and that you experience the peace that only God can give. :o)

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Merry Christmas

Wishing you and your family a very Merry Christmas!!
May you all experience the peace that only God can supply
and be sure and give Him the glory for it!
God bless <3 p="">


Monday, December 23, 2013

Doing Better...A Bit Better

Just wanted to check in and let you guys know that I am doing better. I am still sore- but I am much better than I was yesterday. Today I have tried to be careful with what all I am doing. And when I start to hurt, I just have to slow down. It is hard for me - because there is so much I could be doing and would really like to be doing but I just can't. So I just do what I can am let the rest go for now. It's all I can do...really. And it is best for me - cause when I over do it I experience a lot more pain and burning. And that is very unpleasant.

Christmas has snuck up on us this year. It really does every year. Most Christmas' up to this point - I used to work at my MIL bakery and so was very busy with extra work around Thanksgiving and Christmas. So I was thinking this year would be different. I would have the time to make Christmas extra special - but then all this cancer stuff reared it's ugly head....and now it seems that most everything is getting done - just not as soon or as I'd really like it. But we just have to accept the way things are sometimes.

Well I would like to continue to write but typing is making my port area sore - so I have to stop - see what I mean - this is affecting so much more than I thought it would. I hope you are all doing well. Have a good evening :O)

Sunday, December 22, 2013

God's Timing

God's timing amazes me!
I had ordered a couple of do-rags - to cover my head once I start losing my hair. On Sabbath they arrived. But my husband seeing that I had gotten a Christmas card and another card from a friend, handed it to me first. After I had opened it, he handed me a Kleenex and my package. And of course, all of a sudden the emotions flooded through me. And tears were about instant.

It was so nice to have the beautiful card of encouragement along with some index cards with Bible verses on them for encouragement as well.
 
Here is what I had ordered:
 
I thought it was so thoughtful of this company Hats 2 Cover.
With my order- she included this little pouch that had this "fearless living" worry stone- along with instructions to carry it along with me to treatments and such and when I start to worry to rub the stone.  Along with that was another quote about being fearless.

I thought that it was so very thoughtful.
 
I am so grateful that God sent the well timed card of encouragement along in the same mail shipment that this package came in. It really fed my soul.
 
I hope you are able to see how God is working in your life, even in these difficult times in life - God is there bringing blessings into our lives.

May we use these difficult times in our lives to love and encourage others along our pathway. :o)
 
 
(This is the 3rd posting for today - don't miss the other 2)

Plus 2 =7

Just an update to let you guys know how I am doing.
Below is a photo to show where my most recent incisions were:
 
Photo: Here is where my newest incisions are, making a grand total of 7 incisions on the trunk of my body.   Still soreness and burning this morning, but gonna try to take it easy and use my ice pack when needed.  Hoping everyone had a great day!! :0)

 These 2 make a grand total of 7 incisions on the trunk of my body.
 
These two - especially the bottom one that has at least 6 stitches in it - is very sore. It seems any time that I move my right arm to do much of anything - it hurts. When I laugh - it hurts. When I take a deep breath it hurts. And not only does it hurt - but it burns. I had not realized that I would have 2 incisions and when the procedure was explained to me and I found out I would be away for the procedure - I really had not been prepared for as much pain as I have experienced. And I have to sleep on my back- because the turning over and moving around like that really hurts. Anyway - had not meant to get on here and complain so much but I just was not really prepared for so much soreness and burning sensation. But I should not be surprised- they had to pull my skin over the port which is pretty big and then stitch the hole shut. So really it should not be surprising cause my skin is having to stretch out.

I am glad the procedure is behind me. And I am just trying to take care of myself so I will heal better- but sometimes it is hard- with having to do everyday things.
 
I hope you all are having a good week end! The sun is shining, but it is still quite cold outside with temps in the 30's right now. With a high of 45 expected. Ya'll take care. :O)
 

Jesus and I

This was the devotional from "Streams in the Desert" for yesterday. Since I know that there are many people struggling with different trials, I wanted to share it for encouragement for your soul as well. May God bless each of you- and know that I pray for you all! :O)

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The exception is Caleb son of Jephunneh; he will see it and I will give him and his descendants the territory on which he has walked, because he has wholeheartedly followed me.”—Deut 1:36


Every hard duty that lies in your path, that you would rather not do, that it will cost you pain and struggle or sore effort to do, has a blessing in it. Not to do it, at whatever cost, is to miss the blessing.
 
Every hard piece of road on which you see the Master’s shoe-prints and along which He bids you follow Him, surely leads to blessing, which you cannot get if you cannot go over the steep, thorny path.
 
Every point of battle to which you come, where you must draw your sword and fight the enemy, has a possible victory which will prove a rich blessing to your life. Every heavy load that you are called to lift hides in itself some strange secret of strength.
—J. R. Miller
 
“I cannot do it alone;
The waves run fast and high,
And the fogs close all around,
The light goes out in the sky;
But I know that we two
Shall win in the end, Jesus and I.
 
“Coward and wayward and weak,
I change with the changing sky;
Today so eager and bright,
Tomorrow too weak to try;
But He never gives in,
So we two shall win, Jesus and I.
 
“I could not guide it myself,
My boat on life’s wild sea;
There’s One who sits by my side,
Who pulls and steers with me.
And I know that we two
Shall safe enter port,
Jesus and I.”

Friday, December 20, 2013

What a Long Day...

It has been a long day.... I am so very tired. I will be going to bed soon. But I just had to get on here and let you guys know that I am ok. We were told to be at the hospital at 11 am. We did not realize that my procedure was not scheduled till 1pm. When we got there- we were told that there had been an emergency at the hospital and that the team that was going to do my procedure had - had to work the emergency so they were running behind.

So they got some blood drawn. And then they started trying to get an iv going. After two unsuccessful tries - of digging around - painful experience. They got someone from the anesthesia team to come and put one in and Praise the Lord she was able to get it on the first try- it still hurt but at least it worked. By the time she was putting it in - I had not eaten or drank anything in about 13 hours, no wonder it was harder to start the iv. Anyway then we waited and waited. We finally talked to the Dr and then waited longer - and a little after 2pm - they took me back for the procedure. I was actually awake during this procedure- I could feel what was going on - not really the pain- except for the several sticks with the needle to put the Novocaine in to deaden the area. I ended up with 2 incisions - one at my neck and then one above my right breast - and towards the inner part of it.

The procedure was done at about 3pm or a little after. And I was able to leave the hospital about 5pm. We needed to pick up our granddaughter at 6pm - so we drove straight over to get her- and did not end up getting home until 7pm. And believe me - the couple of hours of driving - the numbing stuff started to wear off and let me tell you - my incisions were sore and burning. Laughing hurt- as did turning my head. Once I got home - I took a pain pill I had - and I am feeling a bit better. Not sure how tonight is going to go - how I will sleep without pain. Turning my head either way very far hurts.
But I am so very tired - hopefully I will be able to sleep - no matter what position I have to sleep in to bypass hurting.

Anyway I just did not want to leave you guys hanging. You have all been so good to pray for me and I really appreciate it.

Thursday, December 19, 2013

The Power that is Behind Prayer

Good Evening~ Well it is 10:20pm here in Texas. And guess what I am doing? Eating....
Do I normally eat at 10:20pm? Nope...but tonight is different. I was told I could not have anything to eat or drink after midnight- and won't be able to eat until after my 11am procedure. So I decided to drink a lot of water this evening and then all of a sudden I felt hungry - so I decided - I will eat. It will be hard enough for me to go that long in the day without even drinking water. So I cut 2 slices of homemade bread that a sweet lady from my church made and brought to me today. That was so thoughtful. It is delicious bread. It makes me want to get back to baking my own bread, kind of thinking I might have to wait on that for a while- like maybe 4-6 months. But at least I have something else now to look forward to doing. I also got myself 2 "halo" oranges. I love cuties - but they did not have them so my sweet husband bought me some halos. They are pretty good.

Anyway so I wanted to check in here and let you guys know what was going on and to ask you to be praying for me. I know that God will give me the strength and courage that I need. I know I have shared this promise with you all before - but wanted to share it again.

 As your days, so shall your strength be.   
Deuteronomy 33:25
 
 
But what kind of makes me more nervous is that fact that I am going to have this procedure done at a hospital that I have not had anything done at before - nor has my husband. So that makes me a little more nervous- like finding a parking space- it is a hospital in a very busy crowded city. And there are many buildings that make up this hospital - so will we find the right place to go. I am sure we will but it is just the not knowing that is a little scary. The unknown. But I will continue to trust that God is in control.
 
I will try to get on here and update you all tomorrow after I get home.
 
 
Thanks so much for the prayers - I really do appreciate them. I am beginning to realize the high value of prayers. I have always known they were important - but I am realizing more and more the power that is behind prayer. And as I realize how many prayers are being said for me - and how far reaching they are - it just amazes me. Not only are people I know praying for me - but there friends and family members of mine that have their prayer chains and churches praying. And if I were to see a map with dots of people praying for me and where all the dots are around the map - I think I would be totally amazed. I continue to lift each and everyone of you that visits this blog. :o) 

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Chemo Class - and Port

Well today my husband and I went to the Oncology place for a Chemo class. I learned a lot of things that I will need to know for the next 4-6 months of my life. Everyone's Chemo is different and the way people respond to it is different. So you get a list of symptoms to watch out for- and list of what things to call the Dr. about. We also had a tour of the facility. And then we got a little goodie bag- which had a pretty pink pen in it, a nice pill case, a thermometer, and a magnet with important phone numbers on it.

When we were taken into the infusion suite- where the chemo is given - the nurse leading our tour told us that the room used to be plain white walls - and that a lady paid to have the walls painted- so there are scenes and such painted on the walls. So it is no longer plain white- that is a great way to pay it forward. She was able to enjoy it but just think of all of the people that have come after her to have pretty scenes to look at.

I also found out this week that I will be having my port put in on Friday. I had really wanted to have it done the Thursday or Friday after Christmas - so it was quite a surprise to get the call saying it was THIS Friday.

At our class today- they actually had a port that they showed up. Oh my goodness- it was bigger than I thought it would be and the hose that goes in the vein was about 12 inches long or so. Just a little scary thinking that by Friday - I would have one of those.

I was going to get a photo and put it here so you all could see it but I just don't want to look through those photos to pick one- if you are interested - go to Google and type in Ports used to get Chemo and then images. And you will get probably more than you want to see - like I just did.

When you get the diagnosis of cancer- you get a whole new education- that is for sure.
I got my hair cut yesterday- probably about 4 inches or so. It is just above my shoulders- about 2 inches -about chin level. Today we found out that a lot of people lose their hair about 10-14 days after their first chemo treatment.

I hope you all are doing well. I am doing pretty good.

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Trust and Rest

Good Morning~ I know I had said I probably would not be back till Monday - but my devotional this morning was too good not to share with you all. I hope you are blessed by it as I was. Hoping you all are having a good week end. :O)

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Trust and Rest
by Mrs. Charles E. Cowman

"Trust also in him" Psalms 37:3a

The word trust is the heart word of faith. It is the Old Testament word, the word given to the early and infant stage of faith. The word faith expresses more the act of the will, the word belief the act of the mind or intellect, but trust is the language of the heart. The other has reference more to a truth believed or a thing expected.
Trust implies more than this, it sees and feels, and leans upon a person, a great, true, living heart of love. So let us "trust also in him," through all the delays, in spite of all the difficulties, in the face of all the denials, notwithstanding all the seemings, even when we cannot understand the way, and know not the issue; still "trust also in him, and he will bring it to pass." The way will open, the right issue will come, the end will be peace, the cloud will be lifted, and the light of an eternal noonday shall shine at last.
"Trust and rest when all around thee
Puts thy faith to sorest test;
Let no fear or foe confound thee,
Wait for God and trust and rest.



"Trust and rest with heart abiding,
Like a birdling in its nest,
Underneath His feathers hiding,
Fold thy wings and trust and rest."

Friday, December 13, 2013

The Results are In

As you all know - my appointment with the Oncology Dr was this morning. And the results? Well- NO cancer showed up on my ct/pet scan! Praise the LORD!!!! What wonderful words to hear. Now- that does not mean that this journey is over, nope. I will still have to have 6 rounds of chemo- lasting 18 weeks - and then when that is done - I will have to do radiation- 3-5 treatments. And the first one of those sounds really uncomfortable and difficult. I will have to have a port put in before Chemo starts.

My Dr. told me that I might want to cut my hair in anticipation of losing my hair. She said that it is usually harder for women with longer hair to lose their hair- mine is not long, but it is about 2-3 inches past my shoulders. So Monday is my appointment to get my hair cut - and I am going to have it cut to about my chin - and have her do an undercut - I think so it will kind of curl under. I think that is probably as short as I can go right now- I will face- having no hair when that day comes.

Just wanted to leave you with a wonderful song about praising God for ALL His blessings. May it bless your soul. Have a wonderful week end. We are about to go get our grandbaby for the week end so I'll probably be out this week end - see you guys next week. :O)


Bless the Lord, O my soul
O my soul
Worship His holy name
Sing like never before
O my soul
I'll worship Your holy name

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Today Was Test Day

Well - today was my pet scan/cat scan. I did pretty good. I had an emotional morning and was afraid I would be crying the whole time - but I decided it would be a great idea to get a small notebook out and start writing out Bible verses that really have encouraged me lately. Once I had written at least 10 or more I felt so much stronger. 

A good friend of mine had offered to take me to the testing. I was so thankful. My test was at 1:30pm. I had been told to eat by 7:30am - and I had to eat eggs, cheese, and meat. Well I was not really in the mood for that stuff at 7:30am. I had a rough night- did not sleep very good. Anyway I did eat what I needed to. I was glad my friend took me because I don't think I was thinking at 100% - before the testing and by the time the testing was over about 2 hours later - I was thinking even less.

First they tested my glucose level. If it had been too high or too low they would not have been able to go forward with the testing. I was thankful that my level was good. I forgot to ask what it was. Anyway then they injected tracers into my blood stream. I was then told that I needed to drink this water/iodine solution about 12 oz. - I needed to drink it slowly over a 30minute time period. Once the time went off - I needed to reset it and pour the rest of the solution into my cup and drink it slowly in another 30 minute time period. Once that was over  - I had to use the bathroom and take off my bra - the metal would interfere. Then it was time to go for the scans. I had to lay down- a wedge put under my knees and my arms up over my head- so basically holding my hands right above my head. They Covered me with a blanket and then the machine took me in and the process of scanning my body began. It was so hard not to move. I could breath and have my eyes open or shut - but other than that I needed to be still. This part took about 40 minutes or so. About 3/4 of the way through the test - all that liquid had made it's way to my bladder and I was needing to pee. I handled the small spaces fairly well. There was a time or two in the test that I had to breath deep and pray for some peace. I used a lot of the time reciting Bible verses that I have memorized and praying for people I know that needed prayers. I was so thankful when it was over with. It is nice to have it behind me.

Here kind of what the machine that was used for my testing looked like:

PET Scan


Picture borrowed from This website - I was looking up the difference between PET scan and a CT scan.

I had forgotten to take a snack with me and my friend who drove me there - needed to get back home - so I had her take me back home - instead of stopping for something. I thought I was doing pretty good- until I ate and then I felt like a bottomless pit. I asked my husband if he would make me some popcorn - not the microwave stuff- that stuff I have heard is not good for you. So I am staying away from it- had decided that before this surgery - even before I found out I have cancer. I am thankful that God led me to make some good choices and that I listened to His guidance. How many times have I not though, that is disappointing to me and I am sure to Him as well. God loves us and if we will surrender our lives to Him, He will guide and direct us.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.   
Proverbs 3:5-6
 
Tomorrow morning at 11:00am - I have a Dr appointment to find out the results of my testing that was done today. Please be praying about this. Praying that the cancer had not moved out of the uterus. I am also praying for a good nights rest - I am tired. Thanks so much ~ Lisa :O)

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

I love Flowers

Hello~ How are you all doing? Me? Doing pretty good considering... The good news is that the sun has come out today!! And although it is still below freezing there is hope that some of this yucky ice will melt away. I sure hope so because sometime later this week I have to drive to my pet scan and I do NOT like to drive on ice - don't have hardly any experience and just don't like being out in it. So I stay home. I am so grateful to have that choice. Not everyone does.
 
I noticed that I forgot to share some flowers that I got at the hospital.
 
Photo: Flowers I got while in the hospital from some very special people! :O)


And yesterday - I got these. It was funny. I had no idea I was going to get flowers. I got a phone call- a man that I did not recognize, from a phone number I did not recognize - asked if I was Lisa ........ and I said yes. He said where are you at? I am like.... ummmm ... why? He said he had flowers for me. lol - Then I was willing to tell him how to get to my house.
 
Photo: Flowers I got today from some other very special people I know!!


I just love flowers and it really made my day to get them.
 
Yesterday was a rough day for me. I am not surprised at all - just the news alone could make anyone have a rough day - or just the fact of having the hysterectomy and no longer having the hormones could also make me have a rough day. And then to put them together... goodness. I am just allowing myself to cry when I need to. It seems that the shower seems to be a place that I tend to think more, I guess I am not distracted by anything while I am in there and so I tend to let my mind wander.
 
Last Tuesday morning, I went to my favorite little thrift shop in the small town nearby. And I was happy to find, among other things, these two books!!!!
 
Photo: Look what I just found!!!!
A friend had recommended these to me - and she had actually let me borrow her books. And I had begun reading- The Science of Prayers it's ABC's"
And not only did I find both of the books - they were only 50 cents each!! That was a God thing. He knew I needed my own copy of them. What I have read so far has been great. I would highly recommend them.
 
I do hope you are all doing well. Take care :O)
 

Saturday, December 7, 2013

Open the Trenches

Here in Texas- we are still iced in. So it will be another day of staying in. There is no need to get out in this stuff if you don't have to do so. There are many of the roads closed due to the inability of vehicles to get through. There are highways that have miles of vehicles - many of which are semi's stuck - unable to move.

My devotional today was just too good not to share. So without further to do- here it is:

Open the Trenches
By Mrs. Charles E. Cowman

"Ye shall not see wind, neither shall ye see rain; yet that valley shall be filled with water, that ye may drink, both ye, and your cattle, and your beasts. And this is but a light thing in the sight of the Lord: he will deliver the Moabites also into your hands" (2 Kings 3:16-18).

To human thinking it was simply impossible, but nothing is hard for God.

Without a sound or sign, from sources invisible and apparently impossible, the floods came stealing in all night long; and when the morning dawned, those ditches were flooded with the crystal waters, and reflecting the rays of the morning sun from the red hills of Edom.

Our unbelief is always wanting some outward sign. The religion of many is largely sensational, and they are not satisfied of its genuineness without manifestations, etc.; but the greatest triumph of faith is to be still and know that He is God.

The great victory of faith is to stand before some impassable Red Sea, and hear the Master say, "Stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord," and "Go forward!" As we step out without any sign or sound--not a wave-splash--and wetting our very feet as we take the first step into its waters, still marching on we shall see the sea divide and the pathway open through the very midst of the waters.

If we have seen the miraculous workings of God in some marvelous case of healing or some extraordinary providential deliverance, I am sure the thing that has impressed us most has been the quietness with which it was all done, the absence of everything spectacular and sensational, and the utter sense of nothingness which came to us as we stood in the presence of this mighty God and felt how easy, it was for Him to do it all without the faintest effort on His part or the slightest help on ours.

It is not the part of faith to question, but to obey. The ditches were made, and the water came pouring in from some supernatural source. What a lesson for our faith!

Are you craving a spiritual blessing? Open the trenches, and God will fill them. And this, too, in the most unexpected places and in the most unexpected ways.

Oh, for that faith that can act by faith and not by sight, and expect God to work although we see no wind or rain. --A. B. Simpson

Friday, December 6, 2013

5 Lessons Learned and More

    Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You anoint my head with oil; My cup runs over. 6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me All the days of my life; And I will dwell in the house of the Lord Forever.   
Psalms 23:4-6
 
 Last year my friend had a book club/prayer meeting- from the book by Beth Moore- "A Woman's
Heart- God's Dwelling Place." I was so blessed by this book. I found a place in my journal of the lessons I had learned from this study so far- and at the tend of this post I will post that list. But first.... 
 
 
After our meeting right before we took a little time off for Christmas - my friend asked me to stick around a bit after the meeting. After everyone left - My dear friend asked me if I had ever been anointed. I said no...not that I know of. Well she said that she had been led by God to anoint me. She also gave me some special verses. She said that when God let her to anoint someone that He also gave her special verses to give to the person. Well do you know what the verses that I got were? Yep - the ones posted above. Psalms 23:4-6.
 
Posted in my journal - after telling about the above I wrote:
"I still don't quite understand what these verses mean but I'm hoping that in time that God will reveal the meaning to me."
 
Today I had remembered about the anointing and looked up the verses to make sure of which ones they were and found that section of my journal. God has been preparing me for this part of my journey for a while now. 
 
I'm not saying that I think this all will be easy - I am only sharing that this reassures me of the fact that God is in control and like another good friend told me - Nothing happens that surprises God. Remember that - I think it is important for us all to remember - especially when things come along in our lives that knock us to our knees. But remember - if you are knocked to your knees- you are in the perfect position to pray.
 
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Ok- now for the list of 5 of the things that I learned from the above book study and was reminded of today as I read them.
 
1. God has brought us out of sin (Egypt) but many times we desire what the world has to offer us. And because God is a god of free choice He will allow us to make our own choices even if that means allowing us to sin and sin until we are sick of what the world has to offer.
 
2. God is faithful even we are not.
 
3. We need fresh manna from Heaven every single day - 1st thing in the morning.
 
4. Suffering helps us to be more compassionate to our fellow man.
 
5. Sometimes we need help from others in this journey through life.
 
 
All of these are very important but number 5 was a lesson that I seriously needed to learn- and it is becoming more and more important and needed in my life right now.
 
I hope you all are safe and doing well. We have ice/snow/sleet covering the ground. My son tried to get to work and ended up in a ditch. Praise the Lord he is fine but the car was damaged. We found out about our son right before my husband left for work and thankfully he changed his mind about going. My other son did not have to go to work. So we are all basically staying home this weekend- as the temps are not expected to come above freezing till maybe Sunday afternoon. I am thankful that we have electricity - many have lost power. And I am extra thankful for a fireplace - just in case.
 

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

There are many people dealing with Cancer

Ok - Here is what is going on- They are going to schedule me for a pet scan -sometime before next Friday - the 13th. On Friday morning - I have an apt with the oncology specialist again. If the pet scan does not show any or much cancer - I may have to have surgery - if I do- it will be done on Dec 30th. They will have to get samples of lymph nodes in my pelvic region and else where on my abdomen and some tissue samples- to test them for cancer. Apparently the kind of cancer I have is very aggressive and is very unusual for someone my age - 44.

Whether I have surgery or not - I will have to have Chemo - 4 months worth. And Radiation. We do not know to what extent I will have to have radiation yet - we will have to wait until we have the results from the pet scan and surgery(unless the pet scan shows up a lot of cancer).

Bad news for me - is the chemo will make me lose my hair. Unless I am one of the lucky 10% - with God anything is possible. But I am preparing myself for that - just in case.

I know that God is in control - although this has totally shocked me. I was shocked to have to have the hysterectomy - never thought I would have to have one. The last two weeks I have had moments where I have felt sorry for myself because of having to have it. Now my perspective has changed, I am SO thankful that it is out of there. And I am thankful that I did not know that it was cancerous before the surgery - it would have been harder for me to have felt as much peace as I did. God is capable of giving me that peace no matter what - but truthfully I needed to work through acceptance with the hysterectomy and I am so thankful that God understood that and only gave me part of the trial at a time. I have had time to rest and recoup some over the last two weeks. I have gotten a bit of routine of taking some natural stuff for hot flashes and such. Which by the way - I will probably not be able to take estrogen because of the cancer. So it is good that I have been treating it naturally. It is scary to thank that I do not have the estrogen to fall back on if I need to but I am thinking right now the estrogen is the least of my problems. 

Today - when we were at the Cancer Center - it was sad. As I looked around the waiting room at all the people there and those coming and going.

Please when you are praying for me please be praying for all those affected by cancer. There are many people who deal with it and you never can tell. It really makes me want to have more compassion for people - because truthfully we never know what trials others are facing.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

That word you never want to hear....

Yesterday afternoon - I got a call my the Dr. who preformed my hysterectomy. She wanted me to come in the next day. And she wanted my husband to come too. Both my husband and I got red flags - so we were a little worried/concerned. So our appointment was set up for 4:30pm today.

Come to find out I have Uterine Cancer. The lining of my uterus was 2.5 and the cancer was measuring to 1.8 ct. They like it to be contained at 50% - mine was more than that. They said it was a grade 3. I am set up to see an oncology specialist tomorrow.

Please keep me and my family in your prayers.

Edited to say that the cancer went out into the Myometrium - so it is not just the lining of the uterus that is affected. The Grade 3 means it is a more aggressive type of cancer. Just a few things I have learned while researching things from my paper work. I will let you all know what I find out tomorrow.

My Favorite Things

 
It's been a while since I have shared one of my favorite things - and I think because it has been a while since I have found something that I thought was one of my favorite things.

But this past week- as I have spent a little more time in front of the TV - I saw a commercial for this Febreeze stuff and actually remembered it when we went by the store for a few groceries.
 

This stuff smells so good. I have it by my bed and at night before we are going to go to sleep I spray some of it and inhale deeply. Mmmmmm. It is wonderful. They have a few other scents- Warm Milk and Honey and Quiet Jasmine- but my favorite scent is Moonlit Lavender!
 
What are some of your favorite things? 

Monday, December 2, 2013

Fat is a Feeling too

Photo

I think I have already written about this once before but I had something remind me of this again recently and wanted to share.

I am two weeks post surgery. I am actually feeling pretty good, but I was feeling down just a few days ago- do you want to know why?

At the end of August - I decided to give up caffeine(which by the way was a good choice and I will explain later in this post) Anyway - I have also cut my soda's way down. I limit myself to one a day if I have one. Well I also started walking. Well in the 3 months since then I have lost right at 12 pounds. At the beginning of all this I had measured myself and then had measured myself about 1 month before surgery. Well last week I had went to look in my little booklet at my measurements. Well when I looked at it the first time - and then I measured my waist and it looked like I was about 4 inches up on my waist measurement. That discouraged me so very much. And it did not help that when we went to my Mother in laws for Christmas- my sister in law that had stomach surgery about 1 year and 8 months ago- had lost a total of 180 pound. Well the next day I measured myself again. And I thought- I want to go look at my measurements and see what the exact damage since surgery is. Well lo and behold - I had looked at the wrong page and come to find out - I only am up 1/2 inch or so on my waist - which is very understandable when you think of the incisions and the damage done down under the skin.

Once I realized that I was only up 1/2 inch and I have held steady the 12 pounds lost - my whole attitude changed! I no longer feel so fat. Sometimes we can feel fat by outside circumstances- by what we see on TV, by media, by other people and their actions or words. But we need to always go by the true facts. The true facts  - like our true value does NOT come from our size- but comes from the fact that we are a child of God. And I am glad that the fact that I thought were true - the measurements were the wrong measurements. And that the truth was that I was only up a little bit. But what I am truly thankful for is the reminder from God that I can not base my value on those physical facts, but I need to base my value on the value that God has placed on me. This is something that I struggle with - and I am sure that there are many others out there that struggle with this too. I hope that we will all learn to keep our focus on Jesus Christ and the value that He has placed on us. The great value - that caused Him to die on the cross for us - because He loved us and valued us so very much.

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Ok - I said I would explain why giving up caffeine had been a good idea. I have heard that caffeine causes hot flashes to be worse- so I am very glad now that I have up the caffeine. I just love it when I can see God working in my life. For example long before I knew I would have to have surgery - God inspired me to finally - once and for all...to give up caffeine

Sunday, December 1, 2013

2 Weeks Post Op

Well it's about 2 weeks post op. I have actually been doing pretty good. Just experiencing the normal ups and downs of life. But of course, sometimes I feel more emotional than usual.

I had read up on all sorts of things to expect after having a total hysterectomy, but I am finding some new things that I had not expected. My face has been breaking out. I had thought that my biggest problem with my face would be being dry but right now I am experiencing acne. Not horrible but was just a surprise. I am trying to do better at taking care of my face and hoping that things will level out and that it will calm down.

These are my IV spots- the first and the last one- The top photo is the last IV that I got - it was the BIG one that I showed. I can not believe that after 2 weeks it is still this big.

The last 5 days have been a bit harder on me - to be good and not over do it. My son has had his daughter and so we have gotten to spend time with SweetPea. It is so much harder to be have when she is around.

We went to my MIL for Thanksgiving Day and then we had a Thanksgiving Day for our family on a different day. I think I may have over done it then too- my husband did a lot of the cooking but I helped quite a bit. Today I have been feeling a little more sore- could be just because things have calmed down a bit, since we only had SweetPea around till about 2pm today.

After that my husband and I rented a movie from Redbox- Red 2. It was pretty good. He has been so good to watch all sorts of Hallmark Christmas Movies with me - it was nice for him to get to watch a movie he has been looking forward too seeing. We really enjoyed Red so it was fun to get to watch this one. And the way it ended - I am sure we will see a Red 3 in the future.

Well I just wanted to check in with you all. I hope everyone is doing well. I am feeling better and will be doing better to start reading more of your great blog posts. It was just a bit hard after the surgery to focus on things- I had a brain fog - that was really weird - I could feel it come and go - or at least get worse. I have not been having that as bad so I am thinking that it will be easier to read now.

Devil's Burden

Another great devotional- in my "Streams in the Desert" devotional. I hope you all have a wonderful rest of the week end! :O)

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“There remaineth, therefore, a rest to the people of God” (Heb. 4:9).
The rest includes victory, “And the Lord gave them rest round about; . . . the Lord delivered all their enemies into their hand” (Joshua 21:44).
“He will beautify the meek with victory” (Ps. 149:4). (Rotherham, margin)

An eminent Christian worker tells of his mother who was a very anxious and troubled Christian. He would talk with her by the hour trying to convince her of the sinfulness of fretting, but to no avail. She was like the old lady who once said she had suffered so much, especially from the troubles that never came.
But one morning the mother came down to breakfast wreathed in smiles. He asked her what had happened, and she told him that in the night she had a dream.
She was walking along a highway with a great crowd of people who seemed so tired and burdened. They were nearly all carrying little black bundles, and she noticed that there were numerous repulsive looking beings which she thought were demons dropping these black bundles for the people to pick up and carry.
Like the rest, she too had her needless load, and was weighed down with the devil’s bundles. Looking up, after a while, she saw a Man with a bright and loving face, passing hither and thither through the crowd, and comforting the people.
At last He came near her, and she saw that it was her Saviour. She looked up and told Him how tired she was, and He smiled sadly and said:
“My dear child, I did not give you these loads; you have no need of them. They are the devil’s burdens and they are wearing out your life. Just drop them; refuse to touch them with one of your fingers and you will find the path easy and you will be as if borne on eagle’s wings.”
He touched her hand, and lo, peace and joy thrilled her frame and, flinging down her burden, she was about to throw herself at His feet in joyful thanksgiving, when suddenly she awoke and found that all her cares were gone. From that day to the close of her life she was the most cheerful and happy member of the household.

And the night shall be filled with music,
And the cares that infest the day,
Shall fold their tents like the Arabs,
And as silently steal away.
–Longfellow