God's Hand Leading...

Today I was reminded by God that He is in control and has been in control this whole time! Before my hysterectomy I had not even heard of the da Vinci surgeries. Well as soon as I knew that I had some problems and needed to find a gyn. I am a friend of mine who is a nurse, which Dr. she would recommend. She recommended 2 - who did the da Vinci surgeries. She said that the ladies who had the da Vinci surgeries seemed to recover quicker and that it seemed to be easier on them. Well one of the Dr she named - had delivered our grand baby and so I just knew she was the one I needed to use. She is an excellent Dr. and I am thankful to God that I was reminded of her - she really made this journey easier on me. When it was decided that I needed a surgery we decided on the da Vinci surgery which would mean that my uterus would be removed through the vagina. Now this is where things get really interesting. Today I found out that when people do laparoscopy surgeries - a procedure called Morcellation - it is a process in which the object that is being taken out ends up in pieces so that they can come out of the small holes. I know this is very non-technically explained - but you get the idea. You can look it up if you would like to know more. Anyway so if I had have chosen the laparoscopy type hysterectomy and they had used this process- my body would have been exposed to the cancer and there would have been a greater chance of the cancer spreading. Remember - when I had my hysterectomy - we had no idea that there was cancer. So God led - me not only to the right Dr. but in the process we made all the right choices that helped protect me from the potential danger. It really helps reassure me that God is in control.

I am realizing more and more my need of God leading in my decision making process. The story above really made that clear- before I even realized the danger - God was in the process working it out.

Today I had another interesting thing happen. I had ran to town to run some errands. I had meant to get gas while I was out and about, but I had ended up coming home another direction and missed all the places I normally like to stop. Well several miles down the road from my house is a gas station- and the price was actually 4 cents cheaper than any of the other places. So I decided to stop there. When I swiped my card - I waited for the normal question asking how I wanted to use the card but did not get that - instead it asked for a 5 digit zip code- I typed that in and when I went to get the nozzle into my gas tank- I had not squeezed he handle at all but gas had started to come out - just a little bit - but when I turned around and looked at the pump - I noticed that it had charged me for 6 cents of gas. That was weird since I had not even squeezed the handle. Then when I began to pump the gas it came out slowly. As I stood there I just had a bad feeling about everything - I thought that if the pumps were in that bad of shape then I was sure that the tanks that the gas is held in are more than likely in bad shape as well. And I decided even though the price was the cheapest around that I did not want to fill up my car. So I go to an even number and stopped. And left. I may never know for sure if it was God leading or if it was just mean but that is ok - I would much rather listen to the feelings that I got and be safe than to be sorry. I want God to know that I am listening and that I am willing to allow Him to lead in my life. And each time we listen and obey - the easier it becomes.

If you are on Facebook and would like to be friends just leave me a comment and a way to get ahold of you through e-mail or such and I will get back with you. I would love to have you as a Facebook friend. :o)

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Oh and I am SO very glad that I had went to the insurance website yesterday(a prompting from God- I believe) because today - we received a bill at it had a whole long list of charges - and had I not know about them I might have been blown away by the 3 pages of charges. A blessing in disguise- that I had faced that information before I received the bill associated with it. God is good! :O)

Fat is a Feeling too

I think I have already written about this once before but I had something remind me of this again recently and wanted to share.

I am two weeks post surgery. I am actually feeling pretty good, but I was feeling down just a few days ago- do you want to know why?

At the end of August - I decided to give up caffeine(which by the way was a good choice and I will explain later in this post) Anyway - I have also cut my soda's way down. I limit myself to one a day if I have one. Well I also started walking. Well in the 3 months since then I have lost right at 12 pounds. At the beginning of all this I had measured myself and then had measured myself about 1 month before surgery. Well last week I had went to look in my little booklet at my measurements. Well when I looked at it the first time - and then I measured my waist and it looked like I was about 4 inches up on my waist measurement. That discouraged me so very much. And it did not help that when we went to my Mother in laws for Christmas- my sister in law that had stomach surgery about 1 year and 8 months ago- had lost a total of 180 pound. Well the next day I measured myself again. And I thought- I want to go look at my measurements and see what the exact damage since surgery is. Well lo and behold - I had looked at the wrong page and come to find out - I only am up 1/2 inch or so on my waist - which is very understandable when you think of the incisions and the damage done down under the skin.

Once I realized that I was only up 1/2 inch and I have held steady the 12 pounds lost - my whole attitude changed! I no longer feel so fat. Sometimes we can feel fat by outside circumstances- by what we see on TV, by media, by other people and their actions or words. But we need to always go by the true facts. The true facts  - like our true value does NOT come from our size- but comes from the fact that we are a child of God. And I am glad that the fact that I thought were true - the measurements were the wrong measurements. And that the truth was that I was only up a little bit. But what I am truly thankful for is the reminder from God that I can not base my value on those physical facts, but I need to base my value on the value that God has placed on me. This is something that I struggle with - and I am sure that there are many others out there that struggle with this too. I hope that we will all learn to keep our focus on Jesus Christ and the value that He has placed on us. The great value - that caused Him to die on the cross for us - because He loved us and valued us so very much.

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Ok - I said I would explain why giving up caffeine had been a good idea. I have heard that caffeine causes hot flashes to be worse- so I am very glad now that I have up the caffeine. I just love it when I can see God working in my life. For example long before I knew I would have to have surgery - God inspired me to finally - once and for all...to give up caffeine