Trust Me- It Doesn't Help

Today I will be sharing some of my heart with you dear reader in hopes that maybe I can help someone else who may be in my shoes. I think sometimes we say things that really hurt others and cause extra pain and add extra weight to the burden they are already carrying and we may not even know it.

Maybe these stories were told to me before but I don't remember them. Maybe it's because it didn't hit so close to home. But it seems that ever since my husband was diagnosed with early onset Parkinson's mostly those who love me feel the need to tell me stories of people with Parkinson's- including all the gory details.

Just this week at the most inopportune time (at a restaurant, in the middle of the meal) my mother in low out of no where began to tell me of a long ago pastor and his poor wife with Parkinson's. We had not been talking about my husband or Parkinson's - it was just totally out of the blue. Almost like a slap to my face, it took my breath away. It took all I could do not to cry. And I couldn't even say anything for fear the tears would start if I did.

She's not the only one, I've had this happen with other loved ones- who I have asked not to tell me the horrible stories - who forget I asked them not to or because they think I need to hear it...continue to share the stories with me....

Do these people thank that I do not know about this disease?

Do they think that they are helping me?

I know plenty about Parkinson's. My husband and I went to a Parkinson's symposium, we sat there (the youngest couple by far) for several hours hearing the brutal facts. I do not need to hear stories of other people I don't even know. I have enough pain dealing with reality. I do not need the extra burden of what I might be dealing with in the future. When the fears creep in, I try to turn them over to God. He is in control.

If you know someone dealing with a painful diagnosis or their loved one is, please think twice before sharing scary stories with them. Because truthfully all that does is causes fear- and where does fear come from? It doesn't come from God.

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."

II Timothy 1:7

 

I choose to claim the verse in Deuteronomy:

 

"As your days, so shall your strength be."

Deuteronomy 33:25b

 

 



This was true for me during the cancer "adventure" I went through and many times before and since. I believe God will continue to get me through each day. It doesn't mean it'll all be easy- don't I already know that, but I continue to trust in God.

So please think twice before passing along those unpleasant experiences. Instead think of uplifting and encouraging things you can share with those you may think are in denial - because they are probably carrying around more pain than you realize. And those sad stories don't help.

 

When trying to decide what to say - this is a very good verse to consider:

 

8Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

Philippians 4:8

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Come back next week when I will be sharing a post about  ~what would Jesus do