Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Self Acceptance Part 2
One day not too long ago after I had hung up the phone after a conversation with this person, I was feeling really low. So I began to write a letter to this person. No- the letter was never sent to her, but it did me a lot of good. While I was writing this letter the Holy Spirit really helped me figure out what I had been doing wrong. You see I had placed this person on the throne. I had looked to them for my value and it was the WRONG place to be looking for my value. I needed to take that person off of the throne and allow God to be on the throne in my life. I needed to look to God for my value. God is not a respecter of persons. Your education, your looks, your weight, your money... none of these things impress Him. He loved each of us so much that He sent his Son, Jesus to die on the cross for us. He values us so very much. For He looks on the inside and He sees what he created us to be. This realization helped me tremendously. My value comes from God. I am valuable because I am a child of God and He loves me unconditionally. I don't have to be good enough. And that is so nice to know because I have struggled my whole life with trying to be good enough.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Self Acceptance Part 1
I have battled a weight problem for what feels like all of my life. And what is really sad is that I felt fat even when I wasn't. I look at the photos now and can not believe that I thought I was fat.
I come from a family of big boned people. I had 4 uncles who at about 5 ft. 6 - 7 inches were probably about 300 pounds. And these same uncles felt it was important to tell me and my sister not to get fat. We did not see them very often- maybe a couple of times a year. But they took every chance they got to tell us comments like, "Don't you ever get over 200 pounds" and "You don't want to get fatter."
And what is really sad is that my Mother did not want my sister and I to get big heads so she did not like us to get compliments so we were never given the idea that we were ok. We were not told that we were pretty, so we thought we were not. We thought we were worth less than other people.
Well during this time recently as I have been working on making changes in my life. I have just recently figured out that I am not lower than other people, nor am I higher than anyone. We are ALL equal. And that is a really nice feeling.
So I may be overweight but I am learning to like myself and to accept myself right were I am.
Tomorrow I am going to share how I have become able to accept myself and where I am getting my value from.
* I wish I had a photo of myself when I was a girl and I thought I was fat to share. And as soon as I can get ahold of one I will add one here.
A Beautiful Tuesday Here In Texas
See these two planters on our front porch? Well we found them at Lowes for only $16.97. They are nice concrete ones too! I was so excited when I saw the price. I have seen the nice concrete ones before and really like them but they were way too expensive.
These are a couple of the trees that we cut the limbs and all off the tree to about 4 - 5 feet up. We are hoping that they will continue to grow and give more and more shade out there. I am thinking of getting a bench or some chairs to put out there. When all the leaves come out on those trees it is a great spot - during the summer heat.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Ranunculus
Anyway the tag on them said Ranunculus Mix Perennials. I think they are gorgeous flowers. Especially the photo of the pink and yellow ones.
Scientific classification
Kingdom: Plantae
Division: Magnoliophyta
Class: Magnoliopsida
Order: Ranunculales
Family: Ranunculaceae
Genus: Ranunculus
I also found out that all Ranunculus species are poisonous when they are eaten fresh by livestock. But apparently they taste pretty bad and they cause blistering in the mouth so this keeps animals from wanting to eat very many of them. I don't blame them one bit. Oh and Buttercups are in this Genus of plants - I think is how you would say that. Maybe? And it also looks like humans probably ought to be careful when handling them as well.
Parkinson's
I wish I knew someone that had a loved one that was diagnosed with Parkinson's at an early age and maybe they would know things that we need to know and be willing to share. If you are this person - please feel free to contact me - I would love to hear from you. I am hoping that there is some sort of support group that I can get involved in. But I am sure that God will bring that into my life when it is really needed.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Busy Day
Saturday, March 27, 2010
At just the right speed...
This morning, I heard an explanation that I really needed to hear. You know sometimes I feel really discouraged that I am not growing and changing into the person that I want to be as fast as I would like. Well it was pointed out to me that with a tree - you can cut them down and you can look at the rings to learn about their growth. Some years there is a lot of rain and sunshine and the tree experiences a lot of growth. Then other years are dry and the tree just gets by and has just a little growth. I have had years like both of those examples. Some years I feel like I am moving forward, making some progress. But other years I feel like I am not making any progress at all. What is so neat about it is that God knows exactly what we can handle and he does not give us more than we can handle. And even in those rough time periods when we don't feel much growth - they are happening for a reason. God works everything out for his purposes. And if I will just focus on Him and turn my life and my will over to Him, then I can be more relaxed at the pace I am going. Knowing that I am not going to slow or to fast...I am growing at just the right speed.
Friday, March 26, 2010
Actions speak louder than words
Today a friend posted the following as her status on Facebook.
"Your going to come across people in your life who will say all the right words at all the right times. But in the end, it's always their actions you should judge them by. It's actions, not words, that matter." Nicholas Sparks
It got me thinking how very true this is. I know a lot of people that do a lot of talking but the way they act just don't line up with what they say. Then as I was listening to a sermon on the radio they asked if our actions showed that we were Christians or not. I had to admit that in recent weeks I had realized how angry I was acting. Normally under the surface, but sometimes it showed up in ways like getting very upset with the way other people drive or when I am shopping and people were rude. And I realized that I had not been acting like a Christian. This past couple of weeks as I have been studying my Bible more and spending more time with God. I have actually felt a little bit of a change. Reacting positively in situations when I would have normally been upset. And it hit me - with Jesus in my heart - I am able to allow Jesus to love others through me. Oh don't get me wrong please... I am SO far from where I want to be. I still react in a negative way to things I shouldn't. But there has been just enough of a change that it gives me hope. Hope that I can become more and more like Jesus. Oh and if all of these "coincidences" weren't enough - I saw a church sign that said something like "Be a window that others can see Jesus through." God has so many different ways to speak to us. He uses so many different ways, if we will just pay attention. It is so neat when I figure out that I actually got the lesson that He was trying to teach me. I am sure there are many times that He has tried to speak to me and I was too busy. But I don't want to be to busy any more. I want my actions to speak that I am a child of God. I hold onto to this promise: "being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ" Philippians 1:6
"All the beautiful sentiments in the world weigh less than a single lovely action."
New Books
To the right is one of the photos from the book. I love this idea and am hoping that my husband will make me one for our back yard. I think it will be a great addition to our yard.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Enjoying the Journey
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Enjoying Roots
Sunday, March 21, 2010
"The Little House on the Prairie"
The truth is that they had to work so very hard. What is so cool about those simpler times is that there was not so much influence from the outside world which meant that the parents had so much more influence on their children. Oh and good Christian morals were so much more important. When someone said they would do something, they did. Shaking hands on a deal made it official. Mothers were at home and taught their children all the skills needed to take care of themselves. Fathers worked hard to support their families. Communities came together to help their neighbors. There are so many more reasons why I love these books, I just can put them into words are this time. I look forward to reading through these books.
What books do you like to read that help you understand the simpler times?
Saturday, March 20, 2010
Putting my BOM block together
At this point I ended up making a mistake and had to unsew(another word for seam rip pieces apart) 4 pieces of fabric off of the block. I had thought that the next 4 color blocks went on the bigger edges of the block - but what I was really suppose to do was sew the green pieces onto the smaller ends of the quilt block.
Friday, March 19, 2010
The start of a great hobby...
There have been a few more that I have made and I will see if I can get photos. Oh I have given a couple away so I do not have photos of all the quilts I have made. I am going to do better about getting photos of the quilts I make. When you make a quilt you really get attached to it. I think it is because of all the time and effort that goes into making a quilt. It is a lot of work but well worth it. Now that I make quilts myself, I can totally understand why homemade quilts are so expensive... There is ALOT of work put into them.
I have some BOM blocks that were done in civil war fabrics that I am working on putting together now. Well, actually I am in the process of cutting out ALL the pieces to put the quilt together. There is a lot of work just cutting out all the sashings and fabric to put the quilts together. It will be a while before it is done. I have a few little projects that I am working on. Like some place mats. I will show them when they are done. Oh and by the way..I am not the typical quilter by any means. My work is NOT perfect. I try really hard to do a good job but it just does not come out that way. So I like to believe that my mistakes - make my quilts - uniquely mine.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Not all it's cracked up to be...
My husband had great grandparents growing up. His grandparents would take care of him and his two brothers about every week end. And they even took the boys on vacation with them. I credit his Grandparents for a big part making him the man he is today. I grew up in many different towns and states - rarely any where near my grandparents so I really did not get a chance to really get to know them. I still loved them a lot but I really missed out on spending time with them and us really getting to know each other.
Because of all of this We decided that we would be good grandparents. We would not be to busy to see or take care of our grandchildren. We would be a part of their lives. We would get to know them. This past January, our first grandchild was born. We were so excited. The love in our hearts was so big it was spilling out. I realized for the first time what unconditional love really was. Nothing could make me not love her.
Our Granddaughter is now 2 months old. She lives about 2 miles from us. So you are thinking - you get to see her all the time...no. No we don't get to see her hardly at all. You ask why? Well because we know that they are a new little family and they do not need us just dropping by all the time. We don't want to over step our boundaries. We want to have a good relationship with our son and daughter-in-law. We have tried to have dinner and invite them over, and that seems to work pretty good. But it is just so hard to go a week and a half - two weeks without seeing her. It causes you to want to build up walls inside your heart so it does not hurt so much.
And truth be told - if we were not dealing with a lot of other hurts right now - this probably would not be so painful. My husband has Parkinson's - we have only known about it for 6 months. Oh and by the way he was only 39 years old when he was diagnosed. Anyway that has been so hard to accept. He is having to take meds. for different symptoms he is having. For 6-7 years he was a voluntary fire fighter for a small town nearby. He loved to drive the engines, be an engineer and fight fires. But just this past week he had to resign because of the meds he is taking. I am very sure that this has been very hard for him. He tries so hard not to let it show that he is hurting. He tries to be strong for me. But I know. So like I said our feelings are a little raw right now. And it makes it so much harder to accept that being a grandparent is not what it is cracked up to be. This is why it is so important to remember that it is not good to have expectations. When you have expectations - you are let down. So lower those expectations - it sure makes life easier to handle.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Springs Here!
I have also spent some time today working on my clothes that needed to be ironed. I really do not wear a lot of things that have to be ironed but with the couple that I have along the shirts that Jason and Nick wear to church, I end up with a few items to iron ever so often. Since the iron was hot I decided to cut out my pieces for BOM, which is Block of the Month. One of the local Quilting Stores in my area does a Block of the Month each month - on the first week end of the month. It is based on the first Saturday. But I am so thankful that she also has some classes on the Friday morning before that first Saturday. The very first month you pay $6.00 and each month you are given a plastic baggie of directions and several pieces of fabric to use to make the block for that month. If you make the block and bring it in to each class - you get the next kit free, which is awesome! This is the way that I have learned to quilt. A couple of my friends were going to the BOM and invited me to go. I have gone ever since then and I love it. The above photo is the block I will make this month. Bye :o )
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Freedom
My husband and I walked back to the back fence to check things out and cut a few branches off of some of the trees growing back there and we turned around and there were 4 of our chickens following us out there.
I will leave you with a few of the photos of them enjoying their new found freedom!
Saturday, March 13, 2010
Everything I Need to Know I Learned in My Garden
Begin early. But it's never too late to start.
If it doesn't work, try something else.
Life is fragile. Protect it.
Life is enduring. Trust it.
Life is daily. Water it. Weed it. Prune it.
LIfe is indescribably beautiful. Enjoy it and say thank you.
Growth takes time. Be patient. And while you're waiting, pull a weed.
There's something for everybody- different blooms for different rooms.
Pruning hurts. Pruning helps you grow.
Recycle.
Sometimes the tiniest flowers smell the sweetest.
To everything there is a season. But know what zone you're in.
Dream big. But try not to let ambition turn your joy into drudgery.
Grow what you love. The love will keep it growing.
You reap what you sow. But there will be surprises!
This was found in the book " Time Began in a Garden" by Emilie Barnes on page 44
A beautiful day..
Today has been such a beautiful day! The sun has been shining and the tempatures have been in the upper 60's. These are the type days that really make me love living here in Texas. I was able to go on a walk with my Mom and that was really nice. I really needed the exercise, fresh air and sunshine.
Tomorrow will be the big day for my Chickies. We will be putting up the fencing so that they can have a much bigger area in which to enjoy life. The last two days we have gotten 5 eggs a day. Oh and we got our first full sized egg yesterday and when I cracked it this morning - I found a double yoke inside! I wonder what causes it to do that - anyone know?
He that doeth righteousness...
My Bible Lesson had me read 1 John 3:7 today.
"Little children, let no man deceive you:* he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as he is righteous."
The cross reference section of my Bible sent me over to Ezekiel 18:5-9 to understand what "he that doeth righteousness" does. All of these verses are great so please take the time to read through them all. But this post is about verse 8 and it say, "He that hath not given forth upon usury, neither hath taken any increase..." I did not know what usury meant so I decided to look in my "The New Lexicon Webster's Dictionary of the English Language" ( I bought this for $2.00 this week from the Goodwill - oh it's copyright date is 1989.)
Here is what it says about Usury= the practice of lending money at interest, especially at an exorbitant or illegal rate of interest. I thought that was awesome that the Bible would mention that. Clearly stating that it is wrong to take advantage of people by charging too much interest.
Then this afternoon my husband and I were talking about the money that we owe to Lowes on their credit card and how I was so irritated about the fact that their credit card along with Home Depot - charges like 18 - 24% interest or something like that. Can you believe it? Then I started to think of how in the Bible God says to pay a tithe of 10%. Then I thought how can these companies think that they deserve an amount more than what God asks for. You know everything we have is God's and he just lends it to us - this is how I have heard it explained anyways.
Friday, March 12, 2010
Progress, Not Perfection...That is the goal.
In the same way, I used to think that I could be good enough to be saved. I just had to work hard enough at it. I thought I had to be good enough for God to love me and accept me. But the truth is that God loves us so very much - with an unconditional kind of love. "For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16 And I am reminded of the verse, "But God demonstrates His own love towards us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." Romans 5:8. I am so thankful that God loves us so much and with an unconditional love. He loves me even though I struggle with unhealthy thinking. And he is guiding me to become more and more like Him.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Our Chickens
We have a small shed that we have a 10 box laying bins on each side of the shed. This has worked well for many years. We actually got our first chickens about 8 years ago. We had decided to get rid of them about 1 1/2 ago, but regretted it later. We decided to fence a part of our back yard for the chickens so that we can still have a garden and the chickens can have their own part of the yard.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
This past year...
This past year was also the first time that we slowly watched someone die. My husband's step-dad had cancer and we watched as he went down hill. Well actually it was like a roller coaster ride. We would be doing good for a while then a bit of a down hill. Then he was doing good. He was a strong, good man and he loved the Lord. This was a hard experience for me to deal with. And I am so glad that I have the Lord and I was able to lean on Him and grow more into the person he wants me to be.
You know things don't always go the way you plan them to go. As an example of this in our lives: In May our 19 year old son came and told us that his girlfriend was pregnant. This was hard, but exciting for us. They got married the end of July(Which is also the month that my husband and I celebrate our anniversary - #21 this past year.)Since then they have bought their first house. It needed a lot of work but it looks so nice now. And in Jan our first grandchild was born. She is a beautiful, petite little girl. They make such a great little family. We always wanted a daughter and we got the next best thing - a daughter-in-law. God is Good.
I don't know if this is how every grandparent feels or if it is just where I am on my journey in life but after our granddaughter was born and I was able to hold her. I really understood unconditional love. I don't think I had really understood it up to that point in my life. To really love someone no matter what. This is the way in which God loves us. I mean we all memorize John 3:16. And that right there should have taught me about God's unconditional love but life got in the way and I just did not get it. I am so glad that God uses different experiences in our lives to teach us new lessons about Him and about life.
In Sept of 2009 My husband went to a neurologist. The Dr. really believes that He has Parkinson's. This was so hard for us to believe - my husband was only 39 years old. Parkinson's was something that happened to older people. You know his step-dad and his grandmother had it but it did not start till they were in their 60's and 70's. A week later he had a brain scan to make sure that the symptoms were not something more serious. Praise the Lord the scan came back normal. This is something that we are still trying to get used to. In April we will go to a Parkinson's Symposium to learn more about it.
Well at I am going to stop here - I have written so much already. I need to leave something to share next time.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Starting Out
I hope you all have a wonderful day!
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Yesterday my husband came home from work not feeling good. He still does not feel good today. He is at work and has to work a double shift s...
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I have found an excellent resource for healthy living. Here is a link to the site The World's Healthiest Foods . There is a li...